THESELF IN COMMUNITY
TheSelf in Community
Belongingto a particular community motivates, improves health, and makespeople happy. A connection to others enables one to realize that mostpeople encounter difficulties. It is a basic necessity just likeshelter and food. The community is helpful for those dealing withextremelypainful emotions. Communities like churches, friends, family, and thesocial media enable one to have a sense of belonging. One canperceive the community as an association between one or twoindividuals while others view it as a global connection (Cross,2014).In the community I live, I have felt included after the communityunderstood, and helped my family the time my father got into extremealcoholism.
Hewas an alcoholic and the trial to take him for detoxprograms, psychiatric sessions, and rehab failed. He drank too muchand forgot about his family. This angered me as it took long for meto accept my father’s state. I spent most of my time supporting mymother, protecting my siblings, and trying to get help for my father.I did not have time to enjoy with friends. My sisters and I feltguilty, ashamed, lost, frightened, and lonely since we could not talkout the issue with neighbors. He was never there for us as hisrelationship with the bottle was growing stronger daily. We couldonly see him during the weekends as he spent most of his time in thebar.
Atschool, I could not relate well with my friends as I felt inadequate,insecure, dull, anxious, and vulnerable. I was so withdrawn that myteachers got concerned. However, I could not open up to them for fearof stigmatization. I did not want to humiliate him because he was myfather, and I loved him despite the frustration. At a certain point,he could not go to the toilet and feed himself. This put my motherunder too much stress, which led to her development of high bloodpressure. Despite all this strain, she never gave up on him, and thatmade me have hope that someday my father would change. We ended upsuffering in silence.
Asit is said, walls have ears. This came to pass because despite ourefforts to keep our father’s alcoholism in a secret, the communitylearned of it and came to rescue us. The church together with ourfamily friends took it upon themselves to visit and talk to us. Theycame with a therapist to handle my father from home. Additionally,they advised us that we were not the only ones in such situation bygiving living examples of families that got over the issue. Thereligious leaders also talked and assured my mother and me that wewere not responsible for my father’s alcoholism. Every week one ofmy friends and a church member from the neighborhood came to visitus. They provided financial and emotional support for us(Cross,2014).This time, we kept our communication open to them. The therapist wasmaking progress, and over time we joined our father in the therapy asa family. Consequently, his consumption of alcohol reduced and aftera year of visitations and therapy he completely abandoned the vice.We also had a change of attitude as the bitterness gradually reduced,and after some time we became social and happy.
Conclusively,the way the neighborhood treated my family pertaining my father’salcoholism has enhanced my sense of community. I believe that withcommunal sharing of joy and sadness, one’s life gets morefulfilling. Sharing problems makes them lighter and easier to handlejust the way we were able to solve my father’s alcoholism.Therefore, a community is imperative.
Cross,J. (2014). Guide to the community control of alcoholism (10thEd.). New York: American Public Health Association.